Dear Donna,

I am engaged to be married in a few months. We have been together for almost four years and my fiance recently surprised me by telling me he plans to handle our finances once we are married.

I have been taking care of my own finances for 10 years and doing a great job. I want us to keep separate checking accounts and open a joint account for shared expenses. He wants all of our money to go into one account, and he wants to pay the bills.

I don’t want to rock the boat just before the wedding, but he is insisting we do it his way and I am not sure what to do. – Sara

Dear Sara,

There is an old saying that goes “whoever controls the money controls the relationship.” I would encourage you to stand your ground. If you have been managing money successfully for 10 years, I see no reason to turn everything over to him.

It should be a joint effort. It is unfair of him to be unwilling to compromise and you should come to an agreement before the wedding.

Dear Donna,

My brother told me if a girl is a good kisser, she is also a good dancer and a good lover. Is that true? – Jake

Dear Jake,

Yes, and the same is true for men, or so I have been told.

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Donna Shugrue owns Perfectly Matched. Her column runs biweekly in Home and Family. Visit perfectlymatcheddating.com or email questions to donnashugrue@comcast.net.