Until this afternoon, I had planned to write this column about a quote I read in one of Julia Quinn’s Bridgerton books.

But, life intervened in the form of a disagreement with my son. I expressed my strong opinions about an aspect of my son’s social life.

My son expressed his own strong opinion.

Neither of us wanted to budge, and finally, after getting angry, I gave up control.

In the moment, I was just too tired to continue the fight. I didn’t realize until a little later that it is no longer my job to manage my son’s social calendar.

He isn’t old enough to make every decision himself, but he is old enough to make a lot of them. He can decide who he wants to spend time with, if he wants to go to a birthday party or a sleepover. I can still say no. I can help facilitate get-togethers with friends. But, I don’t need to push his social life to go one way or another. That’s up to him.

I felt a sense of relief when I let go of needing to manage this for him. And, once he didn’t feel my pressure to make a certain choice, he also calmed down and made a choice that worked for him.

I’m 10 weeks into physical therapy school, so I have my own overly full calendar to maintain. I don’t have the time or energy to be in charge of my son’s social life.

When I dropped my son off at his social engagement this evening, my friend reminded me about Mel Robbin’s book “The Let Them Theory.” I had forgotten that she and I had talked about the book last spring when I read it.

My friend reminded me that this was an opportunity to practice the concepts from Robbin’s book and how much it had helped her.

The idea behind the theory is to simply let the other person do what they’re going to do. Next, you say, “Let me…” and you set boundaries or do other things that you have control over.

We might think we have control over other people — especially our kids — but we don’t. When we relinquish control of the things we can’t control, we feel better, and we can focus on the things we can influence like our own actions.

With this fresh reminder, I’m acknowledging that I can let my son make his own decisions about his social life and likely much more. And, I can do what works for me. In this case, that means dropping all responsibility for my son’s social life and trusting he will learn what he needs to learn when he needs to learn it. At the same time, I can let myself feel more ease by letting go of the illusion of control.

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Joanna Zaremba is a writer, yoga teacher, movement and mindset coach, and student in the Doctor of Physical Therapy Program at the University of Colorado. She helps her clients to trust themselves and their bodies. Joanna has lived in the Pikes Peak Region since 2011 and can be reached at joannazaremba@gmail.com.